Silly Valentines, Special Queens, and Big Brothers
by Eraleigh Aminah
Summary: Silly oneshot. Peter comforts Susan when she doesn't receive the Valentine she wants most of all. Siblingfic,no incest. Happy Valentine's Day, everyone!


**Silly Valentines, Special Queens, and Big Brothers**

**by Eraleigh Aminah

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_Author's Note: Happy not-quite Valentine's Day everyone! This is just a short piece for everyone feeling alone, to remind you that you're special. It's not too great, but I wrote it somewhat hurriedly when the inspiration struck me. I hope Susan's not terribly OOC. _

_Also, if you happen to be a reader of my story Hero, I'm awfully sorry about the delay in the third chapter. I've had a bit of a Writer's Block and I had to rewrite it because I changed my mind about something. Never fear, the next chapter will be up this week._

_Thanks everyone, and enjoy!_

**Note:** _Peter's statement at the end is a friendly, brotherly one, just to clear that up. There is absolutely no incest. Thanks!_

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A fifteen-year-old Susan Pevensie sat alone in the room she shared with her little sister, frowning ever-so-slightly. It was silly that she was so upset. Really, it was. After all, she was a Queen of Narnia. She was a thirty-year-old woman, but she didn't feel like it. She felt like a heart-broken school girl, and it was silly. She shouldn't have felt like this. She had had dozens of suitors vying for her hand in marriage. She hadn't _ever_ been as upset in Narnia as she was now.

But that was because she wasn't in Narnia. She was in England. And in England, she didn't feel nearly as special. She wasn't a queen, and that meant she wasn't as special. She was Susan Pevensie, not Susan, the Gentle Queen of Narnia. Nobody thought of her as a queen here. Which meant that she had to be beautiful and popular with a handsome gentleman beau to be known anywhere. She wasn't like her siblings. She couldn't be who she was in Narnia in England. Because nobody cared or noticed how she was Gentle, but they noticed how her siblings were Magnificent, Just, and Valiant. She wanted to be special here too.

And, sometimes, she did feel special. Whenever she spoke with him, she felt special. She felt a bit like she did in Narnia, when she was a queen. He allowed her to be Gentle, and it made her feel more amazing than she could otherwise ever feel in England. When she was with him, he made her feel like she was perfect without trying to be. Which couldn't be more wonderful.

She was sure that she was being ridiculous. She hadn't _actually_ fancied herself in love, had she? She was only fifteen! It was just a passing fancy. A fancy that left her feeling devastated when she didn't receive a Valentine from him. How silly was that? She didn't feel very special at all anymore. She felt stupid for thinking that anyone in England besides her siblings thought of her as anything but regular old Susan Pevensie, schoolgirl.

The worst was that she had others. Other Valentines sent to her by boys that liked her. But she didn't really care that much, because they weren't _him_. They didn't understand her like he did, _couldn't_ understand her. They couldn't understand her struggle to show the world who she was, and she couldn't appreciate that they just saw her as a pretty and docile girl that would make the perfect wife.

Susan knew that she was like a perfect housewife, but she also knew that she could be much more. She _had been _much more in Narnia. Of course, she had been a queen, but she had also watched over her siblings, dealt with hostile countries, and fought against evil enemies. She wasn't a damsel in distress. She knew she could take care of herself. That didn't mean she didn't like feelings appreciated, though. She liked how he made her feel like a queen in England. Her siblings were like royalty wherever they went, but she wasn't so sure she was all the time. It was nice when she did.

A light knock sounded on the door, startling Susan out of her reverie. "Yes?" she called, hastily making sure that she wasn't crying at all or acting unusual. That wouldn't do.

"Susan?" Peter asked as he opened the door. He was wearing soft grey pants and a light blue shirt with a dark grey vest. His hair neat and combed, his blue eyes concerned and compassionate, Susan thought he looked as handsome as ever. She managed a small smile at him.

"Yes, what is it, Pete?" she inquired. His eyebrows knitted together.

"Su, you look a bit upset," he said, coming to sit beside her on her bed. "And you've been in here for an awfully long time. Are you sure you're alright?"

She faked a smile for him. Peter worried too much. More than she did. And he even had more things to worry about. He had to deal with all of the politicians and councillors and countries threatening violence on Narnia. They had all made sacrifices as kings and queens, but none so much as Peter. And he bore them the best of them all. That was what Susan thought made him truly Magnificent. Still, she didn't want to add to his worries. She had always tried to make his burden easier and be his support system in everything. She couldn't stand to see him so upset.

"You know I'm always - _always _- here for you, right, Su?" He looked truly fretful, and Susan felt like she should have known him well enough to know he wouldn't be fooled by her pretense. Peter made a point of knowing his siblings better than any other. He knew when they were lying to him, and it only made him all the more anxious when they did.

Susan turned her head away from his, biting her bottom lip to keep from crying. Oh, her _big brother_. She could always count on him. He was her rock, the only one that she could turn to when things were too much to handle for her. Finally, she turned back to him, throwing her arms around his and burying her face in his chest.

"Oh, _Peter_!"

"Susan? What's wrong?" Peter's voice sounded scared even as he firmly wrapped his arms around her slim shoulders. Susan just shook her head, unable to talk, overcome with emotion as she was. That only reinforced Peter's fears. "Su? Has someone insulted you? Has anyone hurt you? Aslan, I'll kill them if they-"

"No, Peter, not that," Susan said, her voice wavering slightly, as she rushed to calm his thoughts. "Nothing nearly so bad. It's stupid, really." She closed her eyes tightly to prevent tears from running and just breathed in the comforting scent of her brother. He began to rock her back and forth in a soothing motion, whispering comfort in her ear.

"Suzy, you can tell me anything, you know that," he whispered when she had finally stopped trembling, lifting her face so she could see his soft and calming eyes. Oh, _Aslan_, had there ever been a better big brother? Peter was the epitome of safety and warmth for her. There was always Aslan, but being a tactile person, Susan loved that whenever she needed to, she could reach out for a bear hug from her loving older brother. Sometimes his hugs were even better than Lucy's. Her brother was her support and strength, her rock. She could always depend on him for absolutely anything.

"I know that, Pete," she said softly. "It's just a silly thing, that's all."

"It can't be all that silly, if it has _you_ so upset," Peter reasoned.

Susan let out a surprised laugh at his logic. Peter smiled gently. "So, what is it? Do you not have the _perfect_ shade of cherry red for your next party?" Susan's mouth began to grin against her will.

"Peter Pevensie, you cheeky..." Susan tried to pull away to swat his arm, but he wouldn't let her go. In fact, he pulled her closer, onto his lap, and tightened his arms around her shoulders.

"Yes?" He was smirking, but it faded as Susan grew melancholy again.

"It's not quite as silly as that. But...oh, _Aslan_, I shouldn't be feeling like this! I'm a queen! I've never needed anyone before to be that, why should I now?" The last part was a quiet whisper as Susan realized what she was really struggling with. It wasn't just that she was upset that he didn't like her, it was that she needed him to feel like she was herself. It shouldn't have been like that, right? Once a king or queen of Narnia, always a king or queen of Narnia.

"So...boy trouble?" Peter asked tentatively, and, she thought, with an undertone of fierceness that suggested if _he_ ever hurt her, he would be in trouble. Susan also noticed that although he was clearly out of his comfort zone, he didn't shift awkwardly at all. Steadfast Peter. "What's he done?"

"Besides make me feel like I was someone special and important?" Susan asked sadly. "Nothing."

Peter sighed and nestled his head on top of hers, stroking her hair with fingers that should have been coarser. "You _are_ special, Susan Pevensie," he reminded her.

"I don't always feel like it," she admitted. "But when I'm with him,I do." Tears began to form in her eyes, and she squeezed them shut tight. "It's silly, but around him I feel like I'm a queen again, without having to try. I feel important and respected, which is more than I feel with anyone else." The tears were coming in earnest now, and Susan just let them go, realizing she needed to let everything out. It wouldn't get better otherwise.

"I wish I didn't need anyone else to feel that way. I should be able to feel like that all of the time, but I can't. I don't understand it. You, Edmund, and Lucy always look so majestic, but then I look at myself, and I don't feel it. Why can't I, Peter?"

Peter smiled softly and warmly at her, looking exactly like her big brother. "Maybe you aren't letting yourself. You're trying to tell yourself that you aren't important or regal or beautiful or anything that you were there, but you _are_. You are every bit the Gentle Queen, one of the strongest people I know." Susan tried to deny this, but Peter wouldn't let her. "You _are_, Su. And you won't let yourself see that. That you don't need anyone else to be who you are, and it's just England trying to change you."

Susan let out another sob, thinking that it was rather embarrassing that she had ruined such a nice vest. Peter didn't show any indication that he cared, however, simply holding her as she cried herself out. He knew that she wasn't just crying about one boy that didn't send her a Valentine, but about everything that she felt she'd lost when they came back to England. Susan felt like she had lost herself. There was plenty of grief in that.

Only when her eyes ran dry did Susan look back up. "Peter?" she said with a quivering voice, smiling slightly.

"Yes?"

"I love you." Peter kissed her softly on the forehead.

"I love you too, Su," he answered.

"Peter?"

"Yes?"

"I think I'm alright now."

"Are you sure?" he asked, concerned as always. Susan rolled her eyes at him and grinned. Peter returned that grin, relief flooding his veins. His sister was going to be fine. She picked up a card from where it was laying on a nightstand, and tossed it to the ground.

"I don't really need any more of these," she stated firmly.

"Well, are you sure?" he asked. "I could be your Valentine."

Susan gaped at him. "Peter Pevensie, you cheeky..."

"Please?"

Susan rolled her eyes again, smiling softly and kissing her older brother's cheek. "I'd like that." And Susan had never felt more special in her life.


End file.
